H(Y)ello Patapsco!

There’s this joke my dad used to tell me repeatedly that I eventually inherited and have now told friends countless times.

I usually frame it as a personal story from when I was first learning English. My teacher asked me to verbally draft a sentence using the words green, pink, and yellow. After struggling for a bit, I finally blurted out — in a heavy accent:

“The phone ‘green, green,’ I ‘pink’ it up, and say… ‘yellow?’”

It usually gets a few laughs, but it was probably most appreciated by my friend Melanie Nystrom, with whom I served on the MORE Board of Directors for several years and shared many rides at Patapsco.

When I first started mountain biking in the late ’80s and early ’90s, Patapsco was my local trail system. But since moving away from the area in 2001, the ribbons of singletrack that crisscross this massive outdoor recreation destination have become more elusive and changed considerably. Melanie, for her part, has remained local, and as the trails evolved she continued riding them regularly.

A couple of weeks ago my buddy Dave and I headed to Cacapon Resort State Park to sample the trails there, and afterward we decided we should start revisiting destinations we hadn’t ridden in a while. Patapsco immediately shot to the top of my list, so I offered to show him around my old haunt.

I set out to build a route around some of the areas I remembered most fondly, and to make sure I was headed in the right direction I reached out to Melanie for advice. Naturally, my greeting was simply: “Yellow…”

With her help — and that of Jon Posner, another local who spends a ton of time maintaining and clearing trails at Patapsco — I put together the “H(Y)ello Again Patapsco” loop Dave and I would tackle on Saturday, May 16, 2026.

Dave was adamant:

“If we’re going to drive to Howard County on a weekend, I want an epic ride to be worth the traffic.”

In his words, he wanted to have his “legs ground to paste” by the end of it.

Originally I had planned a 15-mile ride, but based on his requirements I extended it to 26 miles.

After several back-and-forth emails with Melanie and Jon, I finalized the route: a 26.2-mile outing starting from Rockburn Branch Park and winding through several iconic areas of Patapsco Valley State Park, including Orange Grove, Horse Farm, Avalon, and Glen Artney — places I knew well but hadn’t ridden in decades.

My original intent was to ride my regular analog bike. The plan was also to connect with Melanie and possibly a couple of others, but in the end it turned out to be just Dave and me. Dave is considerably stronger on the bike than I am, and knowing what lay ahead, I opted to bring my new Specialized Turbo Levo SL for the outing.

I’m very glad I did.

Patapsco is incredibly fun, but it can also be brutally humbling if you’re not prepared for what it throws at you. I knew we’d be riding some of the best singletrack in the region, but I also knew the trails were packed with punchy, relentless climbs.

The ride did not disappoint.

The weather was perfect and the trails were tacky and fast.

Navigating a bamboo forest in Patapsco along Gray’s Mill trail.

After rolling out of Rockburn Park we quickly entered familiar territory. Morning Choice was one of the first trails I recognized. We followed it, along with several other ribbons near Landing Road, until we reached Cascades Trail. From there we continued onto Upper Cascades, Garrett’s Pass, and Bloede Dam before hitting something I’d never ridden before: Gray’s Mill Trail.

After a short stint on River Road we climbed Gray’s Mill and eventually worked our way toward an insanely fun descent down Buzzard’s Rock. This is definitely not the Buzzard’s Rock I rode back in the ’90s. The newer descent is fast, technical, and wildly entertaining. By the time we rolled onto the mellow Grist Mill Trail, both Dave and I were grinning ear to ear. The paved riverside path offered a welcome chance to rest the legs.

The next section was one I knew intimately. Back in the day, when we rode from the Park and Ride, we always descended Vineyard Trail. This time around, however, both Melanie and Jon strongly recommended climbing Vineyard instead and descending the newer Soapstone Trail to avoid a miserable hike-a-bike.

Wise decision.

The return back toward the river from I-195 was spectacular.

By the time we finished that descent we were sitting at around 17 miles, and Dave had definitely begun feeling the accumulated effort. Unfortunately, he had also taken a tumble on a log-over earlier in the ride, followed by another spill after clipping a hidden branch on the way up Vineyard. Still, he was riding strong.

I, meanwhile, was extremely grateful for the pedal assist. Had I brought my analog bike, I definitely would have been suffering.

The final stretch back toward Rockburn included another trail I had ridden countless times: Ridge Trail. I knew exactly what was coming — demanding but rewarding terrain. We wrapped things up with a pass along John Smith Trail before taking Rockburn Branch Trail back to the parking lot.

When all was said and done we had logged a little over 27 miles. We made a couple of small navigation mistakes along the way but corrected quickly enough to stay mostly on route.

After hydrating and packing up, we headed to Frisco Tap House for burgers and beer before beginning the long slog home down I-95. What should have been a manageable drive back to Northern Virginia turned into nearly two and a half hours behind the wheel.

Was the drive worth it?

Absolutely.

At the time I was cursing I-95 and the Beltway, but in the future I’d simply leave earlier and get a much earlier start. Our late-morning arrival definitely had consequences on the drive home.

Patapsco is every bit as fun as I remembered — honestly, even better. And this “short” loop only scratched the surface of what this massive regional riding destination has to offer.

If you’re looking for a broader overview of the trail system, be sure to check out the Where to Ride section of the site, where I’ve documented several Patapsco loops and route variations over the years.

Next up? After a Memorial Day trip to Roanoke to sample more of what the “Star City” has to offer, I’ll venture back into Patapsco’s Woodstock, Daniels, and McKeldin areas. Stay tuned for those reports.

The route below is what we set out to ride that day.

Bring your legs.